Rencana Aturan Baru: Huruf Yang Disempurnakan (H Y D)

Untuk rekan2, ada bocoran info A1, tentang rencana Mendiknas yang baru bersama Lembaga Bahasa Indonesia.
Silakan disimak.

Belakangan ini timbul desas-desus akan dibuatkannya aturan-aturan baru dalam penggunaan bahasa Indonesia. Salah satunya adalah : Mengurangi jumlah abjad pada bahasa Indonesia.

Abjad yang digunakan di dalam bahasa Indonesia berjumlah 26. Ke-26 abjad tersebut rasanya masih terlalu banyak, dan lagipula ada beberapa abjad yang jarang sekali digunakan. Oleh karena itu mari kita sederhanakan abjad-abjad tersebut dan menyesuaikannya dengan kata-kata yang kita gunakan.

Pertama-tama, huruf X, kita ganti dengan gabungan huruf K dan S. Kebetulan hampir tidak ada kata dalam bahasa Indonesia asli yang menggunakan huruf ini. Kebanyakan merupakan kata serapan dari bahasa asing. Misalnya taxi menjadi taksi, maximal menjadi maksimal, dst.

Selanjutnya, huruf Q kita ganti dengan KW..

Serupa dengan X, kata2 yang mengunakan huruf ini juga sangat sedikit.

Berikutnya, huruf Z. Huruf Z kita ganti menjadi C. Tidak ada alasan kuat tentang hal ini.

Huruf Y diganti dengan I. Hal ini dilakukan sebab bunii huruf tersebut mirip dengan I. Kemudian huruf F dan V keduania diganti menjadi P. Pada lepel ini masih belum terjadi perubahan iang signipikan. Hurup W kemudian diganti menjadi hurup U.

Berarti sampai saat ini kita sudah mengeliminasi 7 hurup. Hurup iang bisa kita eliminasi lagi adalah R, mengingat baniak orang iang kesulitan meniebutkan hurup tersebut. R kita ganti dengan L.

Selanjutnia, gabungan hulup KH diganti menjadi H. Iang paling belpengaluh adalah hulup S iang diganti menjadi C. Hulup G juga diganti menjadi K. Dan hulup J juga diganti menjadi C. Caia laca cudah cukup untuk hulup-hulup konconannia. Cekalank kita kanti hulup pokalnia. Cuma ada lima hulup pokal, A, I , U, E, O.

Kita akan eliminaci dua hulup pokal. Hulup I mencadi dua hulup E iaitu EE.

Cementala hulup U mencadee dua hulup O iaitoo OO. Cadi, campe cekalank,keeta belhaceel menkulangee hooloop-hooloop keeta. Kalaoo keeta tooleeckan lagee, Hooloop-hooloop eeang telceeca adalah : A, B, C, D, E, H, K, L, M, N, O, P, T.

Haneea ada 12 belac hooloop !! Looal beeaca bookan ?? Padahal cebeloomneea keeta pooneea 26 hooloop. Eenee adalah penemooan eeang cankat penteenk dan cikneepeekan !! Co, ceelahkan keeleemkan tooleecan anda denkan menkkoonakan dooa belac hooloop telceboot.

------
Huahahaha selalu ngakak tiap baca ini. Dapet dr milis.

Funniest Exam Answers

Ini beberapa jawaban ujian yg kocak. Dapet dari internet tapi lupa webnya. Udah lama banget soalnya.. Soalnya? Kalian bisa menebak sendiri seperti apa soal2nya.

Essays Answer:

”Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around giving people advice. They killed him. Socrates died from an overdose of wedlock. After his death, his career suffered a dramatic decline.”

“The greatest writer of the Renaissance was William Shakespeare. He was born in the year 1564, supposedly on his birthday. He never made much money and is famous only because of his plays. He wrote tragedies, comedies, and hysterectomies, all in Islamic pentameter. Romeo and Juliet are an example of a heroic couplet. Romeo’s last wish was to be laid by Juliet. ” (to be laid?? Mmmbbbaahhahaha)

“Abraham Lincoln became America's greatest Precedent. Lincoln's Mother died in infancy, and he was born in a log cabin which he built with his own hands... Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves by signing the Emasculation Proclamation.”

"Julius Caesar extinguished himself on the battlefields of Gaul. The Ides of March murdered him because they thought he was going to be made king. Dying, he gasped out: 'Tee hee, Brutus.'"

"Ancient Egypt was inhabited by mummies and they all wrote in hydraulics. They lived in the Sarah Dessert and travelled by Camelot. The climate of the Sarah is such that the inhabitants have to live elsewhere."

"Another story was William Tell, who shot an arrow through an apple while standing on his son's head."

"It was an age of great inventions and discoveries. Gutenberg invented removable type and the Bible. Another important invention was the circulation of blood. Sir Walter Raleigh is a historical figure because he invented cigarettes and started smoking. And Sir Francis Drake circumcised the world with a 100 foot clipper."

"Writing at the same time as Shakespeare was Miguel Cervantes. He wrote Donkey Hote. The next great author was John Milton. Milton wrote Paradise Lost. Then his wife died and he wrote Paradise Regained."

"One of the causes of the Revolutionary War was the English put tacks in their tea. Also, the colonists would send their parcels through the post without stamps. Finally the colonists won the War and no longer had to pay for taxis. Delegates from the original 13 states formed the Contented Congress. Thomas Jefferson, a Virgin, and Benjamin Franklin were two singers of the Declaration of Independence. Franklin discovered electricity by rubbing two cats backwards and declared, "A horse divided against itself cannot stand." Franklin died in 1790 and is still dead." (contoh jawaban yg polos. Hahaha)

"The sun never set on the British Empire because the British Empire is in the East and the sun sets in the West." (??? Huahahaha kocak banget)

"Charles Darwin was a naturalist who wrote the Organ of the Species. Madman Curie discovered radio. And Karl Marx became one of the Marx brothers." (Curie? Radio? Marx Brother? Hiahahaha)

“The Greeks were a highly sculptured people, and without them we wouldn't have history. The Greeks also had myths. A myth is a female moth” (Female moth?? Buahahahaha...)

“Actually, Homer was not written by Homer, but by another man of that name.”

---------

Ngakak abis gw bacanya.